Pre-Marriage Lessons To Learn From The Book Of Ruth

In the previous post we looked at the personality of Ruth and her impeccable leadership qualities. This current post on is intended to share basic Christian premarital tips. We will identify relationship and marriage expectations as popularly associated with the story of Ruth.

As far as Christian marriages go, some principles cannot be compromised. Likewise some red flags should not be disregarded. Marriage is an institution ordained by God himself. In fact, it was HIS idea. Our relationship with God is always described as a marriage. The second coming of God is likened to a groom coming for his bride.

It can’t be emphasized enough that marriage is IMPORTANT to God. Every marriage has a purpose. That is why Godly values go a long way in the making and sustaining of any marital union.

Becoming the word made man, Jesus chose to take up the human nature within the confines of a marriage. God’s plan for humanity significantly comes through the institution of marriage. With the union of Adam and Eve, humanity multiplied. With the union of Mary and Joseph, the redemption plan took shape. Likewise many other marriages that occurred from Adam down to the line of David and then to Jesus. One of those is the marriage of Ruth and Boaz.

It is true that the era and setting of the story of Ruth differs with the realities of the modern world. Still the principles that played out in the aspect of her self-development, meeting and marriage to Boaz still stands and is very much viable in the “jet age” context.

If we start off wrongly with our significant others right from the first meetings and courtship, then we are very likely to hit rock bottom in marriage. Hidden in the lines of the story of Ruth are Christian premarital tips ladies should take note of.

1. Find Yourself

Every human being made by God has a purpose. We are expected to individually and communally contribute to the good of the society. Everyone is a potential leader. Ruth displayed a great level of strength in making life better for Naomi. In the same way we are expected to be pro-active; making a positive change and difference in any space we find ourselves.

What is sad is that many ladies both in and out of church look forward to wealth controllers and Boaz look-alikes to come and sweep them off their feet. Self-mastery is important before you begin to share your life with another. KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

Ruth was being her hardworking self with the sole target of taking care of Naomi when Boaz came into the picture. She was not the only female worker in the field. Neither was it recorded that her physical beauty caught his attention. It was way more than the bone straight hairs, complexion and bodily curves. There was something from the inside that resonated and connected the two; something that assured Boaz that his wealth was safe with Ruth.

See More: 5 Leadership Lessons To Learn From The Book of Ruth

2. Relationship With God

This is where the study and conversance with God’s word, prayer, discernment and obedience come into play. As a matter of fact, this is the leading of all Christian premarital tips for any successful relationship, courtship and marriage.

It is difficult not to discern an oddity in your relationship if you give God the first place in it. In the 3rd chapter of Ruth, we see Ruth’s blind obedience to Naomi’s directives. This is how it should be with God. Why? Because HE is OMNISCIENT. HE has seen the end from the beginning. Only HE knows the plan that HE has for you. Therefore, HE knows with whom the purpose for your life will be best fulfilled.

To describe Ruth’s obedient act of laying at the feet of Boaz in terms of desperation will be utterly erroneous. Esther never envisaged marriage with a pagan. Mary never bargained to be pregnant out of wedlock. So it is not strange that God sometimes takes us through unfamiliar routes in order to manifest HIS will.

What happens in cases like this is that God’s “peace which surpasses all understanding” will resonate in your spirit. It will overwhelm any iota of uncertainty within you.

3. Develop A Heart Of Service

All the notable women you may have come across, from the Bible, to your immediate family to the world at large, became that popular because they possessed the will to SERVE. This is one of the Christian pre-marital tips that millennial ladies must never forget. The Bible says the greatest of them is the one who is humble and willing to serve. This is a leadership principle that pertains to everyone irrespective of gender.

In serving the needs of others like Ruth did, you experience growth, more knowledge, understanding and maturity. Marriage is an institution riddled with service and sacrifice. Both parties are expected to serve each other selflessly. If you lack the heart of service as a single person, it may be hard to escape marital frictions in the future.

4. Your Purity/Dignity Would Matter To Your Spouse

Your spouse-to-be will dignify/honor you by doing things rightly. Boaz instructed the men in his farm not to molest Ruth. Finding Ruth in his tent, he ensured that she left early. He did this so that people will not assume wrongly about her. Same thing happened in the story of Joseph and Mary. Your spouse-to-be is your protector and will not permit any form of disrespect come to you. He will love and honor you like a precious jewel.

I would recommend Rev. Fr Lawrence Lovasik’s Clean Love In Courtship. It will be worth the read.

5. Don’t Dwell On Past Hurts

God always has something better for you. Ruth’s first marriage ended on a sorrowful note. In due time, God blessed her with a marriage that has remained a model for centuries. The Bible says that “all things work out for good of those who love God. Ruth is a proof that God saves the best for the last.

6. What Will Be Will Be

God knows your spouse. Once HE has ordained it, NOTHING can thwart it. There was a chance of Ruth ending up with the eldest in the family but Boaz was not insecure. He went ahead to do the appropriate thing- presenting Ruth and the implications of marrying her to the family. Eventually, he ended up with her like it was supposed to.

There’s no need to scheme, manipulate or get into ungodly tricks to get what you want even if it is the will of God. Do what you know is pleasing to God and let HIM do the rest. And you can trust that HE’ll do a much better job than you ever can.